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Okay so… Iâ€™m bisexual; Iâ€™ve known that for a while now. It was very hard accepting it, but I finally did. Now I need to come out to my family. Iâ€™ve been in lesbian relationships and actually the only time Iâ€™ve fallen in love, it was with a girl. Iâ€™m getting to know this other girl I really like a lot. She came over 2 days ago and met my mom… it was kind of awkward because last week she sent me a text message saying “hey baby, call me asap. luv you” and of course my mother read it! (Why did I have to leave my phone at home THAT day?) Well, when I came home this happened:
- “Whoâ€™s Krystie?”
- “A friend of mine, why do you ask?”
- “Well she left you a pretty weird text message… Why does she call you baby?”
And for a moment my heart went up to my throat…
- “I donâ€™t know mom… we do that you know… friends… all of us… we call each other baby and hottie and stuff like that.”
When she said “oh” I knew she didnâ€™t believe me at all… see my mom is kind of homophobic and she knows Iâ€™m not. She knows Iâ€™m in the schoolâ€™s GSA and she knows a lot of my friends are gay and she knows Iâ€™m supportive of everything that has to do with gay rights. I get mad at her every time she says something inappropriate about gay people and lately Iâ€™ve been snapping at her every time she does it… so Iâ€™m guessing she must have umm… a clue? Maybe?
Iâ€™m Puerto-Rican and my family is a very traditional and religious. My mom thinks being gay is “against gods will” which I find totally pathetic. The point is that I LOVE my mom to death. Iâ€™ve NEVER hidden anything from her except for my sexuality and it hurts me so much to know that who I am disgusts her. Iâ€™m so scared, because I know that sooner or later Iâ€™m going to have to come out to her and my whole family, but its her that really scares me to death.. I know that when I do Iâ€™ll break her heart. I need help… Iâ€™ve thought about ignoring who I really am and just going on with my life pretending Iâ€™m something Iâ€™m not… but I know thatâ€™s not the right thing. I just donâ€™t want to hurt her, because it would break my heart… advice anyone?