How Long Does It Take to Let Go

This post has already been read 434 times!

Okay, my “story” is just beginning and it would take way too long to go into details, but the gist is: how long does it take to let go of past relationships?  A few months ago, I ended a long relationship with a man.  I ended it for many reasons; one of course was my realization of my sexual preference. The list is a long one by far…. alcoholism… verbal abuse…. control issues… you name it. I left to start over and find out who I am again and start living life. The problem is, the more I try, the harder it is on my ex, therefore the less I want to move on because I can’t stand that I’m hurting someone.

My ex knows that I believe I’m a lesbian and it has been extremely hard on him. I told him because I thought it would make me leaving easier on him… boy was I wrong. Even though we had a disastrous relationship I still have a heart and it is killing me to move on while he’s in pain. I’m meeting new people and I have to keep it from him. I wish I could never talk to him again… move a thousand miles away; but I feel as if it’s not possible. Someone told me once: “what’s the worst that could happen? That he’d kill himself?”… and that is constantly on my mind. Like I said before, he’s an alcoholic… and his drinking is spiraling out of control at the moment. I’m the one who gets the phone call at 3 in the morning to pick him up… What am I to do? Ignore him and have something terrible happen to him? I hate the fact that he is still controlling my life and sometimes I secretly wish something would happen to him, like jail… So I wouldn’t have to deal with it. 

I guess what I’m looking for is any ladies out there that had to leave a relationship before with any substance abuse problems and have some advice for someone like me. How long does it take to let go? What were your experiences like? 

If you want to give advice to the submitter of this post, please consider leaving a comment or subscribing to the RSS feed to have future TLQ posts delivered to your feed reader.