Friends With An Ex?

Ask yourself, why do I want to keep this person as a friend? You seem a bit upset at the potential of ruining this today; are you trying to hold onto something that isn’t there anymore? If so (and be honest with yourself), you should probably focus your energy on another person.

If she is truly someone you can care about strictly as a friend, make the attempt to stay in contact. The most important thing to remember when being friends with an ex is to avoid bringing up a lot of your relationship history. This shouldn’t be an effort to forget your past with her, but to show her you’ve moved on and can enjoy your friendship in the present.

I don’t know how long you guys dated or how serious it got, but generally the longer/more serious, the more difficult it is to have a friendship in the end. The only exception to the rule is if the breakup was completely mutual. If you both once had strong feelings for each other but gradually grew apart, a friendship is possible. If one of you left the relationship broken-hearted, chances are it’s not going to work.

The jerk boyfriend is a tough one…you shouldn’t have to deal with him. He shouldn’t limit who she sees and she shouldn’t allow him to be a jerk.

Unfortunately, for the most part, good friendships with exes are rare. They are possible however and if you can have one with your ex, go for it.

Good Luck

I think that being friends with an X can be a wonderful thing, if both parties are on the same page. My first love and I are very good friends. She is engaged, I’m single, and regardless of our individual relationship status in life, because we believe that the love between us is real, we are able to connect on a level that strictly platonic relationships will never understand. We like to say, “we get each other”..
She and i understand what every smile, groan, laugh, and sentiment means from each other. It’s like an ongoing inside joke. We know how to reach inside of each others heart and pull out the best in each other. I believe that when you truly love someone you can love (regardless of where they are in their romantic life), as long as both parties are honest and open and respect each others boundaries that you determine together. We want the best for each other, and we have gained closure on the fact that we are not meant to be partners.

I think for some reason, we lesbians are able to have a friendship with an ex but personally, I find it hard to understand. I think I couldn’t do it unless thousand years pass, but it trully happens.

My girl who has had several relationships before me is friend with her exes. In fact, some days ago she, 3 of her 4 exes and me were hanging out in a party, it was funny. She says it was hard at the beginning specially with those who still had feelings for her (good and bad feelings!).

I think you are perfectly able to do it, but you seem angry, and that is a feeling that doesn’t allow you to really get close. I think you need some more time before you can start a friendship with her, especially because this kind of triangle may cause you resentment.

About the guy, he is not part of your life, he is just her jerk boyfriend that’s it. Don’t deal with someone like that, it’s not worth it.

You shouldn’t let the jerk boyfriend get to you, thats more her problem. Don;t deal with him if you don’t have to.

My ex had one a boyfriend like that and she broke up with him for me (I didn’t ask her to, I’m not that girl) anyway she went back to him and I never spoke/saw him because there ws no point. Though she then cheated on him with me, and we got back together, its all so complicated.. anyway we are now good friends. But the most important thing to work out is your boundaries, me and her never got there. we are just good friends who hardly ever see each other because we have no boundaries lol.