A Bit Confused…
I thought I’d seek help from you guys. I don’t consider myself a lesbian as I do find men attractive. I may be a bi-sexual, but I think it’s just a phase I have to outgrow, I am fifteen. I find women about twenty or so years older than I attractive… And I know someone around 35, who I am not sure about. Is she ‘hitting’ on me? I REALLY don’t think so; I think it’s just me. Wondering.
I am REALLY close to her, I’ve always been the ‘teacher’s pet’ and I get along with adults better than kids my own age most of the time. She even acknowledges that. It’s just little things. I tell her I love her, I kiss her on the cheek, I hold hands with her, I play with her hair (is that sexua?), I sleep at her house. One time she put her hand on my knee while we were watching a movie, (I was cross-legged on the couch), but I didn’t consider it a ‘threat’, she talks about some pretty racy stuff but I laugh right along with her… WTF IS GOING ON? HELP!
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u only 15…i think they can go to kill for touching on u its called molestion…and these 20 something and 35 year old women should know this
This is a bad situation all around. If you think you might be interested in women and want to explore, look for someone a lot closer to your age. There is something not right about a 35 year old woman hitting on a 15 year old, if that’s what she’s doing.
I won’t condescend to tell you that you’re too young to know what you want, and you’re just being taken advantage of. But I will tell you that you need to step back and look at this as rationally as possible. If something sexual were to happen between you two, she could lose her job and/or go to jail. School would be a hell of a lot harder for you, too, if this were to happen because the gossip would never die down (especially if she’s your teacher?). There are just way too many ways this could end poorly.
Look for people your own age. It may harder to find someone you’re interested in if you’re attracted to maturity, but they do exist. If you really feel the need to explore something with this particular woman, just wait a few years. It will be complicated enough without adding an illegal aspect to it. So just wait.
STOP putting yourself in situations where you are alone with this person. You are 15 and she is 35, it’s completely inappropriate, not to mention illegal. I know you don’t have the perspective to understand why it’s inappropriate, but someday, like when you’re 35, you will.
As for your sexual orientation, don’t be worry so much about trying to define yourself by it. Let yourself be open to love from which ever gender you find it in.
That is a difficult situation. I feel for you; I came out when I was 13 and ever after dated girls older than myself. I understand that when you have a hard time connecting to those in your own peer group and find older women more emotionally and physically attractive it can be hard to think of reasons to not “go there.” But honestly, from my own experience, I have to say you should try to distance yourself from this woman – at least for a while. She could be a great person and someone who you’d (one day) be happy with. But if she can not wait until you are of the age of consent – and NOT one of her students (which you seemed to be implying), then she does not really care about you or your well being and therefore is not someone you should pursue a relationship with.
I have been in a happy healthy relationship with someone quite a bit older than myself for the past 4 years. However, I waited until I was 18 and out of high school before getting involved with her – and I am glad I did. I know it would not have worked if we had started things too soon.
Hope that wasn’t too preachy. Good luck with your situation.
Thanks Girls!! No I’m not her student, she isn’t a teacher. She really dosen’t seem like a threat at all, and we don’t do anything in public it’s more of a mutual affection thing… Idk. Nvm, it’s just weird. She would never hurt me or put me in a position I didn’t want to be. She even said:
“You know you don’t have to do stuff just because I want you to.” (She was refurring to speaking up in a circle about some religous thing, I said ‘I know you wanted me to say something…’)
“I know.” I said.
“You do?”
“Yeah!”
“Alright.”
….Well I know she isn’t a threat I was just wondering if there was anything Weird about this whole thing because I can’t tell anymore…