So How Do I Do This?

You’re going to have to take the plunge sometime, so I suggest now! Expect to be completely out of your comfort zone. Now, I don’t suggest driving up to West Hollywood and hitting up Truck Stop all by yourself, but you have to enter the scene sometime. Once you begin to feel comfortable, you’ll notice a whole new level of confidence.

You might want to convince a local straight friend to be your date and hit up a lesbian bar/club in San Diego. That way, you’ll have someone to talk to but you’ll also get a feel for the lesbian community.

It’s also an idea to become MySpace/Facebook/Ourchart friends with a few local lesbians. Explain you want to get out there and meet people (don’t make it sound like you’re desperate for a date). They’ll probably have a few good tips about the local hangouts (I suggest hitting up a casual lesbian bar first) and could act almost like a “tour guide.”

Good Luck getting out there.

I’m in the same pickle too bad your not located in the DC area…
good luck let me know what you do ! I need the advice as well LOL

Ok, this is a little hard for you… Umm…
do you have any other friends(other than gay) around? Even guys?
How do you normally act when you’re around your friends?

And as evolution said, find lesbian dating sites online, there are plently to go around for San Diego! I bet.
Yeah, you’ll need to just break through your shell and Be Yourself. Being you is the best thing a person could see in someone. You’ll have to get out of this very limiting “comfort zone” you have and should start to live a little, be wild, be crazy, be confident. If you find people you’re interested in, then give them those signals of “Hey! I’m interested!” It works. I think, like you know, the eye contact or just plain stepping up and talking.
Are there any clubs around you could hit up at with some friend? Any friend?

You’ll have to fight out of that shell of shyness yourself, you can’t always depend on friends helping you through your love life all the time. Sometimes is good, but not all the time. Need to be more independent and secure with yourself when approaching women, don’t be afraid girl, they’re just like you! They won’t bite you unless you want them to, be confident hun!
Good Luck!!
Loves, Ro.

I’m in san diego too and don’t have any idea how to get in the scene. Send me an IM (imhugable21).

im SO feeling your pain too except I live in Vancouver and I KNOW theres a huge LGBT scene here. Bummer,
sendin love hardcore long-distance, good luck

If you have friends that are straight and know your gay then I say ask a favor and have them go out with you. I am sure there are plaenty of gay bars in san deigo. You could try looking up gay events not always the bar scene I know we have a local publication that comes out monthly that has events, things to do, all sorts of stuff. The online sites may work as well. I think just jump in there is no how to guide, we all entered the community in our own way but I bet most of us were all afraid at first. I hope it works out for you and remember have fun!!!!

anyone in the DC area? LOL

cantgetitright, I’m in the DC area.

It’s pretty queer friendly in general, and there are a lot of ways to meet people. DC has a huge recreational sports scene – lots of softball, kickball, soccer, basketball and rugby – that anyone can join up. Also book clubs, hiking, running, biking – pretty much anything you can think of has an LGBT equivalent.

there aren’t a lot of lesbian-oriented bars in DC. a couple of clubs, and of course there’s Phase. You can also check out Lambda Rising, which is the gay bookstore on connecticut ave, up in Dupont.

and if you’re still wondering about the scene, pick up a copy of the Washington Blade (local newspaper for the queer community, free on almost every street corner). It’s not the best newspaper, but you can find out about events that are happening and local news.

good luck!

Hey! I’m in DC too! I’ve been to Lambda Rising and i’ve read the blade. It’s true, there is a lot of stuff to do here in DC, I’m just not ballsy enough to go out and do it by myself. I just moved here 2 weeks ago and not knowing anyone is driving me cRaZy! I’m thinking about joining the maryland Stingers Women’s Rugby team… I’ll probably be going to Phase1 on Saturday just to put myself out there and try to meet someone. You only really need to find one person, and then it kinda just branches off into other friendships. So yeah, DC people hit me up on myspace if you wanna hang! myspace.com/schmoonie

And good luck gotkaylee!!!