Ready?
So about three weeks ago I posted on here that I was confused. I am not so confused any more. I am sure that I am a lesbian. Three weeks ago I was sure I was a lesbian I was just afraid to admit it. Today I have told 10 of my closest friends. They all seem to be ok with it. I am 19 and to be honest I am ready to start having a relationship. I am still kind of in the closet, but there are people that know. I have never been in any kind of relationship before because I didn’t want to drag anyone else into my problems. Now though the problem I seem to be facing is that I do not know who is straight and who is not. I do not have the so called gaydar. I think it is because I never really cared if you were gay straight or whatever. I cared if you were a kind person. But anyways, I just want to find someone that I can share my life with instead of having to try to do this by myself. I have realized that I can’t do it by myself. And for whatever reason I cannot get a read on anyone, it is like my judgement for being able to read people has suddenly vanished. If you guy have any clues on how to handle this just let me know please. Thanks for all you guys do.
Josie
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I feel exactly the same way! I’m twenty and have recently come out to a few friends, but haven’t come out to my parents yet. I feel like my gaydar, if there is such a thing is completely nonexistent when it comes to women. I feel like there are no gay women at my school, or at least I can’t tell. I guess my response to your question is what I’ve figured out for myself..there really isn’t a way to decide who is gay and who isn’t, especially on physical appearance. I am usually (for whatever reason)more attracted to lesbian women, its something in my gut. I think you will have to figure it out on a personal basis. If you are interested in someone, you’ll be able to tell if there is chemistry, and if there is…you should go for it. The worst that can happen is you get turned down or embarrassed, but that’s all worth it when it comes to love.
Hey it’s great to hear that you no longer struggle. I am 19 years old too, but I have the best gaydar ever, not to brag or anything =P. I really don’t know why I’m just really good at telling who’s what. I’ve never been with any women and I recently just got over a 4-year crush… sad I know… Anyway, look on the bright side. If you do get turned down by the ones you confess to, let it be the process to a better gaydar. I never told any of the girls I liked my feelings, hence I was never hurt. And strangely enough, my gaydar is 99% accurate… And yeah… I’m not out yet, BUT my main point is you took a giant step towards freedom, which is to acknowledge that you are gay. Congrats again!
me too. 19, big school, no idea who is what, and I’m so sick of being single. know how you feel chica! unfortunately that means I have no idea what to do about it either…
Well I am 2x 19 + a bit more! but sounds like you have your path chosen
Keep going.. it does get easier honest xx
i am also 19 but ive been out for a few years now… honestly it does get easier gaydar isnt something that once you final realize your gay you automatically have. its something you have to work out. you learn the subtle signs. but it does get easier over time.. dont worry
well, i’m a couple of years past 19, but am just coming out myself… like you, i have told my closest friends and my brother but not my parents or the rest of my family…i have no gaydar for girls either, but its easier to figure out which guy is gay…lol… i’ve been paying more attention to girls and what they do, but can’t for the life of me figure out who is gay/bi! it can’t be that there are no gay/bi girls in my area at all?! roxysurf511- any hints as to what these subtle signs are?