Curious
Hi. I feel kind of stupid writing this email but I just wanted to ask someone some things that I’m afraid to tell anyone who knows me. I’ve told several friends I was wondering if I was bi or a lesbian, and none of them have judged me, but I don’t think they think I’m serious. I am serious. I am so seriously thinking that I favor girls over boys.
Last year, I asked a friend of mine who was an adult and bi if she though I could be and she said I was just young and to not really worry over it until I was older. I guess that advice still holds, but I’ve been kind of brooding over it today. Besides my thinking that I favor girls over boys, I also have never loved a boy and never kissed a boy and a part of me finds the idea of sex with a guy disgusting (I’m a virgin but porn is most definitely intriguing, especially lesbian porn). I don’t know. I’m probably not. I just needed to tell this to someone and, like I said, you don’t know me so you were safe. =]
Your insights would be greatly appreciated.
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hug
In terms of sex, I think you can save judgement until you actually do the deed, be it with a man or with a woman. Additionally, sex is only a piece of the orientation puzzle. I have met many lesbians that used to enjoy hetero-sex, but found the overall lesbian experience much more fulfilling.
Since you’re young, I wouldn’t worry so much about a label and just continue to explore and date. You won’t have to sleep around to realize there is a connection. They just happen, go with them.
Good Luck
I don’t think you should worry at all!
You might want to talk to your close friends about it. If they’re really your friends, they should love you for who you are: an ever-changing human being, just like them.
It’s okay that you haven’t had any experience with boys or girls – It doesn’t make your feelings any less legitimate.
Just be cool, have some popcorn and watch the L Word with a friend or something.
Good luck! I know it can be hard, but there are lots of people in the world who know exactly what you’re going through, so you’ve got a universe of supporters and like-minded people.
Be strong and let what happens happen.
I just wanted to say thank you so much for your advice. It doesn’t completely make me feel assured about my sexuality, but it makes me feel less ambiguous, I suppose. Anyway, I just wanted to thank you two. So…thanks. =]