Dating Help
Well, I guess first I should start off with the basics. I’m a lesbian (out-and-proud), and I’m nearing 16. I was in a relationship for two weeks, but it was with a guy and the reason the relationship ended in the first place because I came out as completely lesbian instead of the pansexual I had previously identified myself as (also to note, we never went out on any form of date).
Most (about 90%) of my close friends are LGBT, and I’ve met many more through my GSA. Considering I’m really active in my local teen gay community, I’m finding it weird that I haven’t started dating yet. It’s not that I don’t want to. I’m just extremely confused about how to go about it. I do find myself attracted to certain girls I know. However, I’m looking for advice as to how I should approach the whole dating pool. On one note, one of my friends mentioned this girl she knows who is also lesbian and wants to set us up. I don’t want to be very presumptuous and ask her to do this for me- and also don’t want to appear eager. On another note, how would I go about hinting to others that I’m looking for a relationship? Would I just go up to someone who I know is either bisexual or lesbian and just ask them if they are interested in me?
Also- I feel it important to note I’ve got little to no tact. I can sense the mood in most situations and maneuver myself out of trouble in a non-romantic situation. When it comes close to any sort of situation involving relationships all my social finesse goes away.
Please help!
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I don’t read anything that sounds like either one of you is unhappy...
Being suave around the ladies is an art form of sorts (I’m not claiming to be da Vinci), so give it a little time. Something that might help a bit; the anxiety/nervousness/lack of tact is mutual. Even the girls that appear to be cool and collected overanalyze every last detail.
Try not to approach dating with the idea of wanting a relationship. In this community, those sort of things happen fast enough anyway. I’m sure there are a few girls you’re interested in getting to know better. Rather than approach them by asking “are you interested?” (reminds me too much of “do you like me? circle yes or no”), why don’t you just ask them out to a movie? Or ice cream, Jamba Juice, coffee, etc. The worst thing that could happen is you get a ‘no.’ Most likely, you’ll find a number of girls very eager to go on a date with you. When they say yes, you will get a prime opportunity to practice your dating skills…and maybe even the start of something more.
Good Luck