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I’m 18. I’ve been with my girlfriend for almost 10 months. It’s my first serious relationship. before i met her i was a wreck. Constantly finding different people to love. I was a sinner from hell. Now i am trying and it is for her. I do love her and she deserves all of my love. She is what you would call the perfect girlfriend. I made a few mistakes when our relationship first started, but as time went on they were forgotten. We were doing great for about 6 months now. No mistakes. The only thing is, no matter how sweet and kind and gentle she is i can’t help but notice we have no interests. We can’t discuss to much, mainly random uninteresting things. But i care about her more than the world. So, last weekend my best friend invites me to her sisters house, just a casual chill i thought. This friend of mine has classes with me, we are both art students and we both pretty much have the same personality minus the fact that she is less outgoing and straight. I mean, she is boysih..Idk she has boyish hair. But that is besides the point. That night we ended up getting drunk and it was raining. She cried to me about how she just wished she could be alone forever. I told her no one really feels that way and hugged her tight. We went back inside and went to lay down. As we laid down we began to talk about how she felt again and all of a sudden we started kissing. She knew i had a girlfriend, and from what i recall that night before the kissing she kept noting how lucky my girlfriend was to have me. But as i was saying, we were kissing and things were getting intense so i jumped up. I decided i wanted to go home. i offered her to come and she did not reject. We get to my house and i immediately want to lay down and rest because i feel crazy. We lay down and started cuddling, and then kissing, and then she began to give me hickies. Things were getting hot and i knew i was losing control. She then just stops quickly. Asking “what are we doing?’ I said “i have no idea..it’s just happening” that night we laid there and she explained how she has always felt about me. How i was perfect, had a cute smile and never upset her. the next morning i woke up holding her. Automatic guilt floods me..until she opens her eyes to look at me and grin. What was i suppose to do? This girl is the exact mixture personality wise as to what i like. we cuddled all morning. I eventually took her back to her sisters. When we parked in front of the house we took a breather to realize what reality just did. She said she has never liked girls, she isn’t gay and she has no idea why it happened, but she said she didn’t regret it that morning? Why all of a sudden is she being so invert about her feelings? She told me her family and friends would disown her. That we had to pretend it never happened because of her reasons and the fact that i have a girlfriend. I at first was fine with this, but knew i had to tell my girlfriend My girlfriend that loved me very much. So i told her, broke trust but she wasn’t mad at me all the way. Things are smooth for us again. She understood a drunken stooper. Except..it was a stooper..I had grown feelings toward my best friend Things were awkward at school, she wanted to play it off like we were just fine but we were not. She refuses to talk about it, and i get tongue tied by two problems and that is why i am writing..First, what do i do? Am i inlove with two people? How do i fix this? and second, does my best friend really have feelings for me? I mean she was sober when she said some of these things? Why is she in denial? Why are things tense and weird?