19 yo attracted to middle-aged women?

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I am sexually, intellectually, emotionally attracted to a few middle-aged women. The most intense of these crushes is on a straight, married 52-year old woman. I’m happily engaged & in love with my fiance, but I can’t shake this overwhelming attraction to this woman. I think about it all the time, I have dreams about it. I have no intention of “coming out” to her, although I know she’s very accepting of all sexualities. I know she wouldn’t want any sort of relationship with me other than a friendship — I’m not delusional. I just want to know: ┬áIs this just really neurotic or is it normal for a young woman to be intensely attracted to other women who are much older, and just no one talks about it?

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