Posts by riley_o:

Another Straight Girl Crush…

August 25th, 2008

Well I have been questioning my sexuality for a while now. And I’m pretty sure I’m gay. It’s seemed pretty clear since I got the Tegan and Sara mullet and met this one girl. To help with your opinion I’m 15 years old. I’m pretty young, but pretty sure.

So anyway…. I moved a while ago to California. I met this girl there and we quickly became best friends. The more time we spent together, the more I’ve realized that I really love her a lot. Obviously, just a crush. But still, I can’t ignore it. Because she’s from California, I expected her to be particularly open-minded and she is. About mostly everything, including gay marriage and gay rights. We’ve talked about it on many occasions.

Now. I think she knows I’m gay or at least has some suspicion. I’m only out to my sister yet, so no one really knows. She’s seen my room and what I like, and I think she knows, but she’s never confronted or asked me about it. I’ve wanted to come out to her many times, but I’m too worried to, despite such a strong companionship.

Reason being, she’s an extremely strong Christian. Not that all Christians are against homosexuality, but numerous churches are against it. She seems really open-minded and like it wouldn’t be a problem, but I’m just not sure. And on top of that, I really really really like this girl.

She has had and currently has a boyfriend, but still. She gives me mixed signals. When we sign off of Instant Messenger, she’ll tell me she loves me and how much she misses me. We cuddle a lot and kiss on the cheek. It seems like something two girlfriends would do, in my opinion. But is it just a normal girl thing?

I’m not sure if she’s just confused or if she’s just fooling around, but I could really use some advice.

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