I Know What I Want And I Can’t Have It
I have considered myself bisexual since the first time I kissed a girl and it left me wanting more. This was back in high school. Now I have just finished my first year of college and I have come to realize boys just don’t do anything for me anymore, but I still find myself hooking up with boys when I have been drinking. I don’t enjoy it at all and sometimes I even ask myself what the hell I am doing. I know I should have more self control but still…
Anyway… Now that I know what I want, I am head over heels for this girl who has a girlfriend. She is the first person I came out to and she has helped me come out to some of my friends. I try to stay away from her and her girlfriend at parties because I seem to cause drama between them (her girlfriend is a very jealous person) but one night they got in a huge fight because of me. Her girlfriend left and she looked for me for comfort I guess.
So I comforted her and I kissed her cuts from punching some sort of glass thing and we kind of had a moment. We have had other moments to but we haven’t ever kissed, just meaningful hugs. I know she feels the connection between us because she brings up the moments often but she still sticks with her girlfriend because she loves her. I know she isn’t happy with her though and it makes me crazy because I know I could make her happy. I don’t know what to do anymore and it’s not like I can just forget about her either because we are on the same sports team. I need help. One more thing, I don’t know how to go about finding someone new either. I’m kind of new to this because I have been wasting my time with boys for so long.
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Since she already knows how you feel, there’s nothing else you can do. You may not think that she’s happy with this other woman and you can do better, but it’s not your choice to make. It’s hers, even if you think she’s making the completely wrong choice. In my experience, you really have to accept that or otherwise you’ll kill yourself trying to prove to her that you’re right. I don’t want to say that it never works, but it’s probably not worth the heartache.
Since you’re new to this, I’ll give you lesson #1: You’re on a sports team in college. There are definitely other lesbians around. Time to tune your gaydar.
You can be her crying shoulder if you’d like, however, it’s only going to continue to drive you crazy. If her and her girlfriend are going to split, it’s going to be without a pep talk from you. Unfortunately, you have to let the relationship run its course.
Definitely meet the power sports lesbians around campus, they hold the key to meeting other lesbians in your area. It’s quite stereotypical, but from true experience, the soccer girls and softball girls are your best bet.
LOL - Yep… those softball girls in college - I could spot them a mile away… try basketball too ;). I was the only lesbian on my tennis team… there are definitely lots of sporty dykes around…
Dude as long as u tell this girl exactly how much ur dribbling over her and how much u care, give her a little time and space for her to think things through. If she loves u back (happily ever after ending)then she will probably ditch her girl and latch unto u. Even in that scenario she might still have feelings for her other girl and this might lead to…..cheating.On the other hand if she thinks it over and decides that she does not want a relationship with u right now…wait for it. If u keep dancing around having “moments” she might come around. Just wait and see what she will do.
Things To Remember: 1. Continue having “moments.”
: 2. Once her girl gets what is happening she will bare her fangs and spit venom at u, but u already knew that.
Gay people unite! Waiting for June 16th California! Whoooo!!